The accompanying picture is of Ted, the Norse god of bicycle repair. Recently deciphered runic texts, provided by Carl Fogler from the annals of Trygve Lode, reveal the following:
"[Ted] is holding Mjollnir, the fabled metric wrench of the gods, feared by the Rime Giants (sometimes translated as Corrosion Ogres). His purely historical headgear should not become the subject of helmet wars."
Lode goes on to explain the nature of Mjollnir — and its continued existence — as well as other, underappreciated elements of Norse legend: "[T]he so-mythical-as-to-be-utterly-forgotten Spanner of the Gods had fallen into my hands. While rushing home to fetch this legendary tool — aided and abetted by the redoubtable Terrylee — the long-lost Norse myth, 'Spam and the Spanner,' which told the story of how Spam came to be the sacred food of the Vikings was...um...recovered."
Sometimes the mead really does drip from Valhalla.
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